3rd Agreement

We’re halfway through our book by Don Miguel Ruiz called ‘The 4 Agreements’. This week is the 3rd Agreement, which is ‘Don’t make Assumptions’. What can be said about this one? We’ve all learned what happens when we assume, yes? Should I assume you already know this one? Probably not. I don’t want to make an ‘ass’ out of ‘u’ and ‘me’. See what I did there?

Why might we make assumptions? We’ve all heard, ok, I’ve heard about those inner voices that act to protect us. They’ve decided that it’s their job to keep us ‘safe’ from experiencing something -again- that caused us pain before. Assumptions are basically made up inner truths to support a version of an event as we perceived it. It might not necessarily be accurate. But, It’s our viewpoint. Colored by our perception and processed through our lens. Did it really happen the way we remember it? You may have heard that there are 3 versions to every story, yours, mine, and what really happened. We are very good at carrying our version with us.

Based on how you remember what you think happened, this whatever it is that happened in the past, might negatively inform what direction you might like to go next. For instance, If you want to put on a party for a friend, but the last time you did that, the caterer really messed things up. Or maybe someone wants you to speak somewhere and the last time you forgot your talk. Or I was talking with a friend today who took a real estate class in the past and didn’t pass the test. Thinking about doing these again might get you a little wigged out and cause you to be reluctant to even try. How long ago were these events? It’s been a length of time since then, and you are now a completely different person. You know the adage about not stepping in the same river twice. You’ve grown. So if you’re different now. Just ask yourself, “Just because that happened in the past, why does it have to happen that way again”?

We are all living right here in this present moment. Within that is the idea that nothing has happened before, because it is all in our memory. And nothing is going to happen in the future because the future will never happen. Every time the future shows up, it’s now. Why concern ourselves with something that may never happen.

Remember, assumptions are not based in truth. Make decisions in this moment based on the information you have access to at this time. Stay present and deal with what’s in front of you with the fresh eyes of someone who’s not been here before.

It’s exciting to think about what could be created when we are not blocked, or in any way stifled by something that might have happened in the past.

With this in mind you can’t go wrong.

Just sayin’