Connection

Connection!  You know it. You’ve felt it! You meet someone and it’s palpable. That feeling of connection. It’s a beautiful thing, yes? Have you ever wondered what causes that?  Do we need connection?

Human connection – the exchange of positive energy between people. It can be one of the most rewarding experiences in life.  Notice I said positive energy. It makes sense that negative energy would repel, causing separation.  

How are all connections? I’m not suggesting you take a look at your relationship to see if it’s working, though, checking in from time to time is always a good idea. I’m thinking more about your connection with yourself. Are you good with you? 

How much do you really like you? What do you like about yourself? How about making a list of what you like about yourself. Do you treat yourself well? How well do you spend time alone?  Do you sometimes prefer yourself over anyone else? These are questions people generally don’t ask themselves, but, it’s a good thing to check into from time to time. 

If you’re not in a relationship, would getting into one make you feel whole? If you’re in one, do you feel whole?  I’m thinking of that poster that says “I like who I am when we’re together’.  Does that mean that you make me a better person? And if being with you makes me a better person, how come I can’t be that person without you? Or does it mean that when we are together I feel like I can be completely me?  Interesting that it can mean two different things.  How do you see it? Is there another way to see this I might have missed?  Damn, Dave, way too many questions!

An emotional connection is a bond that holds partners together. It is one of the most important strengths for couples to have. Without a strong emotional connection, relationships can easily drift apart. Then couples could turn to counseling. But at least they’re aware of it because they checked in. 

Social connection is now understood as a core human need, and the desire to connect is fundamental. We’re born with it. It is crucial to our development and without it, all social animals, and we are that, experience distress and other potential negative repercussions.

I bet being kinder to others would enhance social connections. Even those others we aren’t really connected to. Because, as you may know, at some level we are all connected.  

We don’t know what others are going thru. That guy that just cut you off in traffic, maybe on his way to the hospital for a family emergency. The cashier who is less than friendly may have just had her car repossessed.  That little kid who is acting up? He may have just lost his mom and doesn’t know how to process it. Allowing ourselves to feel a little compassion for another, or just accepting what is at that moment, is just one way of connecting. It is simply being open to a little understanding. Do it just because. 

When we realize we’re being hard on ourselves, turn some of that compassion inward. That’s a powerful personal connection.