How many of you have ever thought to yourself, ‘Man, if only everyone thought the same way I do, this world would be a much better place’. Well, guess what… They don’t. And if they did, think this place might be a little flat, a little boring? Besides, if two of us think exactly the same, then one of us isn’t necessary.
The other day, during a mentor session, I watched myself starting to get frustrated with the person in front of me and their apparent lack of not being able to know exactly what I meant and implement it. Damn, what’s wrong with these people, anyway?
Immediately, I found myself, wondering, where was my patience? And I’m sure they felt my frustration, even if it was just a feeling and not a conscious thought.
Well, I noticed that the judgment came in the form of ‘I thought you were smarter than that’, or, ‘why aren’t you listening’, or…or (notice how it’s all about them?)
I also noticed that with these swirling thoughts bouncing around, there was no peace in Dave-Land, Why is that, I wondered.
When we are judging, finding fault, being demeaning, etc, we are entertaining negative thoughts and negative ideas that the ego is presenting to either build me up or take them down. This calls into play a low level of vibration or energy that plays the game, I win, you lose. When we are judging, we dim our own light. Not a good thing.
I’ve been working on non-judgment. The most popular and widely used definition is “The act of looking down upon someone; to regard with contempt or disdain; to regard as an inferior.” Judging creates a situation where someone is seen as less than. Less smart, less capable, less desirable… you can continue with your own list.
If you asked me, I would say that I don’t consider myself superior to anyone. Looking deeper, broadening my definition, I have found a few hidden opinions and some idea seeds that have been sprinkled around since birth that are clouding the vision of the life I’m living today. For whatever reason I’ve carried them this long, they no longer work for me. And that’s why I’m doing this work.
There’s a lot to talk about here. We have more topic than time. But I’d like to leave you with a couple of ideas to play with.
Is there something here you that you are willing and open to taking a look at? If so, try these simple things. 1) Notice what you’re noticing. Are you jumping to a conclusion about someone? It could be a something, but it’s usually about someone. For now, just notice it. Then, 2) ask yourself, Where did that thought come from? Does it serve me? Is this a way I’d like to be? How could I think about this differently?
Here’s another place to start. How about if we stop judging ourselves so harshly? As I’ve gotten better at judging others less, I’m still judging me. When you judge yourself, how does that feel? Does that give you an idea of how someone else might feel when they are judged? Does it make sense that when we judge, there’s no peace?
As I am being less judging, I find there is more peace in Dave-Land. How does it feels over in Judy-Ville, The Rob Farm, Karen’s Corner, Heatherburgh, and the remote places in which you live? Check-in. Let’s converse below. And, let’s work together to, as St. John of Beattle said – ‘Give Peace a Chance”