What exactly is judging? We have thoughts and feelings about a situation and we attach meanings to them. When the meanings about those thoughts produce feelings of anxiety, anger, depression, etc. judging has taken place. When we turn those feelings on ourselves, it has a negative effect on our self-esteem, our happiness, our General well-being.
I’m reminded of Chris Farley doing his interview character on Saturday Night Live. When he asked what he perceived to be a ‘Stoopid Question’ he would hit himself on his head and berate himself. A perfect -tho comedic- example of self-judgment. How many times have we, and I’m on this list too, done something and immediately gone into ‘’Stoopid! Man! What an …..”. How’s that Feel? And would you ever do that to a friend?
Here might be the biggest secret to slow down that self-judgment.
How ‘bout we treat ourselves at least as good as we treat our friends. Show a little self-compassion, some self-understanding. Let’s give ourselves a break! We are doing the best we can. And if we’re not, we can change that behavior. Besides, If we had different information, we would something else. Pause. Take a breath. Relax. Notice what’s going on. Accept what is and either hang with that, on purpose or change it.
We can easily be happier, more at peace, more productive, and more comfortable with us. We can create this! It’s all within our control.
Just Sayin’