First, let’s touch on value. We hear about adding value. “I get a lot of value from that”. How do you determine that? We try to attach a dollar amount to it. But It’s felt, rather than measured. Nebulous, intangible.
But values, as in personal values are very tangible. These are your important beliefs or ideals. In other words, your principles.
Do you know what your values are? Can you name your top 3-4 values off the top of your head? Have you taken the time to define them and understand them? Note that they do change over time, as our lives morph and we grow.
For instance, one of my values has been privacy. By nature, I’m a fairly private person. Not that I have anything to hide. And I don’t mean anything by it. That is the model I had growing up. My brother and I joke that we share on a ‘need to know basis’. ‘;-)
Another of my values is connection. I love connecting deeply with people. How can I expect others to share with me, to open up if I’m not sharing with them? if I’m being private? See the conflict? I wouldn’t have been aware of it if I hadn’t looked into it. There’s a learning opportunity in here for me.
Freedom is one of my highest values. One of my friends suggested I don’t really follow rules. I’m don’t see myself as a rule-breaker, just not specifically a rule follower. I don’t do it on purpose like I’m trying to be a rebel, It’s more the ‘spirit of the law’ kind of thing. And my version of freedom has absolutely nothing to do with stepping on anyone else’s freedom. Everyone’s freedom is personal & something to be honored and respected.
Values act as guides. When we are clear about our values, decisions are easy. When we are clear about our values, our path is a little straighter. When we are clear about our values, we know ourselves more intimately. There is a closeness, a warmth, a comfort of knowing. There’s an ease of being authentically who we truly are, and letting that be our experience.
How can we identify our values? One way is to Google core values. It’s an interesting exercise to attach names to these concepts. Another way is to -and I’ve said this before- notice what you’re noticing. If you’re in a situation that ‘just doesn’t feel right’, what values are being compromised? And you’re in the flow, what values are being supported?
By knowing what your values are, and paying attention to how you show up in the world, your life takes on an ease, a beauty, a flow. a flow that is natural, expansive, authentic, and, well, valuable.
Just sayin’