Month: June 2020

Days of darkness? How ‘bout you be the light. We all know the stories of people who endured tremendous pain, unimaginable darkness, and are still considered to be beacons of light. You may have heard of Anne Frank, Viktor Frankl, Nelson Mandela, Why them?  They wrote about it. And we’ve been asked to sit around and watch TV, read and play cards for a couple of weeks. 

There are many in our midst who, with their peace and their positive focus have endured what other might be considered horrendous times. They didn’t say anything, just put their heads down and got to work, living.

Guess what? We can be them, if we let ourselves be. This is something that is happening around us. It is not us. It is not us!

     There will be time to get back to working 60+ hours a week. 

          There will be time to get back to sitting in traffic. 

               There will be time for being stressed. 

The markets will eventually rebound, sports and music will return, there will be plenty of toilet paper, and this will be relegated to a “remember when?”  

How ‘bout we make the most of the situation we’ve been handed. Embrace the time off. Embrace your family. Embrace yourself. Embrace your neighbor -from 6 feet away.      

With a little effort, we can turn this adventure into a blessing so large it’s hard to measure.   Turn that outer exasperation into inner peace. 

And we will absolutely come out the other side better for having been through this.               

Just sayin.

What do you think you want? Really want. I’m sure there is a list somewhere. It’s probably at least in your head. Let’s take a minute and talk about the reason behind the desire. 

Would you like a new car? ‘Course, who wouldn’t. But what would a new car do for you? Is it just to have the latest and greatest technology? Which could be great fun, of course… or do you want the security that comes with knowing you’ll get from point A to point B safely? 

How ‘bout a different place to live? Do you need or want more or different space? A different location? Or are you looking for that sanctuary that feeds you daily?  That warm honey feeling of ‘home’? 

High on many lists is a special relationship. Some are already in a relationship, but maybe it’s missing something. What are we missing? Someone to talk to, eat with, hold our place in line? Or are we looking for a connection with someone outside of us to help make us feel whole? 

The idea here, is that there is a usually a deeper more intimate reason behind all that we desire. If we take a minute and pay attention, we might find that we already have a lot of the feeling of what these ‘things’ bring us. With a little focus, we can know in our minds and bodies that we are safe. With a slight realignment of perception, we can be safe in our sanctuary wherever our bodies are. And with a little self love, we can have that wonderfully full feeling of wholeness. 

I’m not saying that we shouldn’t have things we want, I’m suggesting that we can access the feeling behind them and live a happier more connected life with what we already have. Be grateful for what we have. Two last thoughts about that. First, having gratitude for the good we have attracts more of that good to us. Second, it’s hard, if not impossible to be grateful and be in a bad mood. And isn’t that feeling of contentment, security and love what we really really want?

Just sayin’

These early days of summer sure seem to be hosting a fair amount of activity. This activity is generating all kinds of thoughts, feelings and emotions.  It makes me wonder, how can we manage our personal weather patterns with all that’s going on around us? 

I know a lot of you, very compassionate, caring people are very upset with what’s happening on a few levels. We’ll touch on just a couple.

But first, we have to accept this plain fact … It is happening. There isn’t anything we can do about it, really. Or, is there? And what might that be? 

Take a breath, step back and realize that it is affecting you in some way. Try to go past ‘I am upset about…’  and identify ’What exactly is getting me upset?’     These events have many facets, many levels.   What ones are the cause of your reaction.  Is it the lighting of the fuse?  In this case, a man died. Needlessly. Is it the bystanders, the apparent attempt at a cover up? Not enough was done? This has caused the scabs to be pulled off old wounds. People are mad. Protesting, rioting, looting. Getting hurt. Buildings and cars being burnt. People’s livelihoods are being lost. We’re still dealing with racism? Heck, we’re still dealing with COVID. Think of all these possibilities. I’m sure there are angles and levels I’ve not touched on.

Now, what -if anything- can you do about it? There probably isn’t much we can do big picture. Can you talk to the country? Will anyone listen? can you stop the rioting, etc? Can you prosecute where necessary? Think about it. What can you do? 

You may be familiar with the concept/saying that fighting for peace is like shouting for silence. It just brings us more of what we don’t want. One thing that we can all absolutely do is to keep ourselves in a place of peace. As in calm down!  This may get a little woo-woo, but hear me out.  The world and it’s situations don’t need any more angst. It doesn’t need more anger.  What the world needs is Peace.

What a great example Mother Earth gave us by showing how, with the peace and quiet that happened in the world because we all stayed home, how much healing happened. There’s a lesson there. This kind of Peace, this kind of healing starts within and spreads outward.  One thing we absolutely can do is to be that Peace pebble in the pond and watch that ripple of our presence flow outward. It may be a small thing, but what if everyone did it, one ripple becomes two, two becomes many, many becomes a wave. A wave of peace. Picture that. Feel that. 

This what we can do. And if you are guided to do more, please do it. 

Just sayin’

As always, I’m curious as your thoughts on this. 

I almost hate to go here. Almost. But, hang with me for a minute, if you will.

Can we talk? There are many issues we could talk about these days. Do they affect people? Generally. Are they good or bad for some people? Yes and no. Do they have anything to do with the size of a person’s nose or what kind of car they drive? No — they don’t. What’s my point? Even though it might be on top of my head, my point is we have got to be able to talk to each other about what is going on.

We need to be able share our opinions, feelings, a couple verifiable facts, and maybe some creative, out of the box ideas on how to remedy this, or make that right…….. without attacking each other! Let me say that again, Without Attacking Each Other.

We are all living together on this rock, hurtling through space at about 1000 miles an hour. – Don’t you think, ok, I think it would be nice to live here with just a modicum of peace, acceptance, respect and understanding, basically because there is nowhere else to go. And that’s only one way to look at it.

Another way might be listening to a different point of view that could actually create a broader perspective. This doesn’t mean you have to agree. This doesn’t mean you have to change your mind. Or change someone else’s mind. What I’m suggesting is we come to an understanding of another point of view. Simple. Just an understanding.

We don’t have to like it. All we have to do is accept that this is a fellow human being’s personal viewpoint or opinion about a topic. We might want to ask questions about that viewpoint or opinion for our own clarification. Again, just the thought, not the person. No hating, no lashing out, no fighting, no talking about their mother. Discussion. Understanding.

It’s important that we have our thoughts. It’s important that we have our ideas. it’s important that we live with our values. It’s important that we respect everyone else’s rights to do the same. And it’s important to live with acceptance and respect.

Here’s a challenge. Talk to someone about something you may not agree on. Stay with the idea without bringing anything personal against the other, or anyone else. Try it for just a week. See how that feels. Get back to me on that.

Just sayin’.

 

When we were little, we loved to get scared. Boo.  We’d watch scary movies, go on the highest Roller Coasters. We love sneaking up on people and startling them. We’d laugh, and call that fun right? We caused it and it was temporary. Then getting a little older we’d start to be afraid of the dark. What was out there? Are there monsters under the bed, or snakes in the closet. And now, a little older, I’m afraid she won’t go out with me. I’m afraid I won’t pass the test, or get into the school or job I want.

Today, we’ve got all kinds of fears, fear of failure, fear of public speaking, fear of success, fear of death, even fear of fear itself. They’ve even got a name for it phobophobia.  And in today’s volatile and social media led climate, we are constantly inundated with fear from everywhere. all the time. What are we so afraid up? And what  exactly is fear, anyway? 

Fear is an involuntary emotion that signals immediate danger. Someone or something is dangerous. They pose some kind of threat and are likely to cause harm to our physical, emotional or psychological well-being. This can be real or imagined. And we can learn to become afraid of nearly anything. 

Basically, what it all comes down to, is the fear of the unknown. If it’s unknown, Why be afraid of it?  That’s why we invented worry. Worry is a choice! I’ve heard it said that worry is a prayer for what we don’t want.

We’re afraid of what people will think if they see the real us, so we put on a facade. The racism we experience is a result of fear of something different. You don’t look like me. So I’m afraid of you. We’re afraid of bosses. We’re afraid of teachers. Afraid of those guys who drive real fast. We’re afraid to meet someone with a beard. “Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood. Now is the time to understand more, so that we may fear less.” —Marie Curie

Where did all this fear come from? Why are we so afraid? Look where we live. On Earth. Beautiful Sunny rejuvenative forgiving loving Earth. Look at the bodies we are in. Functional, self perpetuating, self-healing. And we don’t even have to change the oil.

I was talking to a friend the other day, who’s mom died after a long illness. She said, “she’s in a better place’. A lot of people say that. If it’s a better place, why are we so afraid of it?  Dying is the most natural thing common to all life. No one gets out of here alive. Reminds me of a country song – fraid of living fraid dying.

What might happen if we weren’t so afraid of everything? If we didn’t worry about everything? How might that work? Start by stopping, and looking around. How are you right now? Are you safe? Good. Are you hungry? Eat! Cold? Put on Clothes? Lonely? Call someone. We have the capability to take care of ourselves. We are even capable taking care of others. I realize this can be a very small view, when there is the whole world to think about, but this small view is something we have complete control over. If we have control over us, why worry?  

Sometimes we’re afraid of something because of something in the past that happened to us – or someone we know. Let it go. Remember Raffiki from ‘The Jungle Book’? — ‘It does not mattah it is in the past”

Very simply, in this most perfect and always present moment of right now, there is nothing to be afraid of. Nothing!  

Do you really want to live your lives in fear? You don’t have to.  Stop. Breathe. Look around. Have gratitude for what is. And know that you are safe. 

Just sayin’

As always I’d love to hear your thoughts. They don’t scare me at all.